Two Knicks Just Chillin’
Stephon: So… is she hot?
Steve: Sorry?
Stephon: Is she hot?
Steve: Who?
Stephon: The chick you’ve been staring at for the last two minutes?
Steve: Oh. Haha. No, I don’t stare at girls– er, I wasn’t staring at no girl.
Stephon: You bang her?
Steve: What? No.
Stephon: Suuuure…
Steve: I didn’t.
Stephon: Yeeeeah, okay…
[Awkward silence]
Stephon: Well who were you staring at then?
Steve: I wasn’t staring at anyone. I was just thinking.
Stephon: About what?
Steve: Oh, I don’t know. I guess I was just thinking about how good Bosh is going to be once he adds some muscle–
Stephon: –What a dick.
Steve: Oh, yeah? I’ve never really seen it in person but I’ve heard from a–
Stephon: –Coach Brown. What a dick, eh?.
Steve: Oh, yeah. Ha-ha. Coach Brown. Thought you we’re talking about–
Stephon: –Can you believe this guy? Calling Starbury out in the media like that.
Steve: Yeah…
Stephon: Fuck he really gets under Starbury’s skin.
Steve: Oh, well I’ve got a great body wash you could borrow if you think it’d–
Stephon: –FUCK!!!
Steve: Um, okay… I’m going to just stop talking now…
[Awkward silence]
Stephon: So who you taking off?
Steve: Oh, um… Nate, I think.
Stephon: No, no, Starbury’s taking off Nate.
Steve: Oh, you are? Because I think Coach Brown just told me to–
Stephon: –I said, Starbury’s taking off Nate.
Steve: Well, um, that’s great but maybe we should just check with Coach–
Stephon: –Woah! Listen! Starbury is taking off Nate. Capiche?
Steve: Yeah, okay, okay. Starbury is taking off Nate. Got it.
[Awkward silence]
Steve: Why do you have to talk like that?
Stephon: Like what?
Steve: That whole ‘Starbury’ thing you do.
Stephon: Huh? Starbury don’t know what you’re talking about.
Steve: That! That right there. You just said ‘Starbury’ when you could’ve said ‘I’.
Stephon: Starbury did?
Steve: You just did it again!
Stephon: No?
Steve: Yeah!
Stephon: Wow, that’s weird. Starbury didn’t even know Starbury did that.
Steve: Oh, fuck off.
Stephon: Hahaha…
Steve: Just fuck off. You’re an ass.
Stephon: Hahaha… Starbury hearts Steve.
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The Basketball Jones is a NBA blog and podcast, written and recorded five times a week by J.E. Skeets, Tas Melas and Jason Doyle. Comments, questions and cold hard cash are always welcome and much appreciated. Contact us.
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My standards may not be very high, but that just made my day. Awesome.
Classic!
why do a lot of your parodies involve basketball players with homosexual tendencies? what do you know about the league I don’t? what do you know about urself?
Benjammin’: All I’m saying is that Steve Francis has probably hugged a man in a hot-tub before. Oh, wait — so have I. Um, nevermind. I don’t know what I’m saying.
Tub-love!
FAAAAAAAAAAAAANTASTIC!
was cuttino in the house?
I hate to jump the gun here, but if you had to choose between taking Miami +7.5 against Detroit or San Antonio -2.5 against the Nuggests, which would you pick?
Ree Hearts Starbury and Franchise!
thanx Skeets, you always get me thru this class!
@ LANCE….
who said the Pistons are gonna lose?? go ahead and bet against them… maybe u got to much money and want to lose some.
Lance: I’m scared of both of these lines. If I HAD to take one though, I’d take the MIA (+7.5).
OUTstanding.
Regards, Cuttino
I’m not saying that Detroit is going to lose, I just don’t think they’ll beat the Heat by 8 points. So what’s your pick today? I think those are the best lines, especially with Shaq playing tonight.
Ka’ Malone going to hand Starbury his ass if he talks to Ka’ Malone like that.
awesome man! I’m not a Knicks fan so I don’t know if Starbury actually acts like that, but it was hilarious anyways.
deadspin hearts skeets
It’s about time Skeetsbury. I miss the skits.
I think they are both the same person.
Fuck.ing.A.ma.zing. Instant Classic.
Where have you gone, Jackie Robinson…?
um…no.
That’s hysterical!
[…] Wow, that’s weird. Starbury didn’t even know Starbury did that. […]
That was awesome. I love the way you got Marbury referring to himself in the 1st person thats too cool 4 school :D
[…] Speaking of Starbury […]
Love it! Though I’m a hater who was all over Francis’s balls when the magic traded for him, now that he’s gone I’ll do the homer thing and hate. Jameer all the way.
[…] Two Knicks Just Chillin’ [The Basketball Jones] […]
i love the knicks, marbury and francis (not necesarily together) and that shit was funny as hell
[…] (Ah, shit… why not, eh? For old time’s sake: Two Knicks Just Chillin’ By J.E. Skeets at 4:02 pm on 27/10/2006 — Filed under: Photo Fun, Knicks, Stephon Marbury, Steve Francis […]