Carnival of the NBA #26
“With the first pick in the 2006 NBA Draft, J.E. Skeets’ computer selects… Tyrus Thomas from LSU.”
Hey, it could happen. I mean, after watching the way my computer just completely quit running this weekend, I’d say the chances of it scoring that number one ping-pong ball are pretty damn high.
Yes, my hard drive died on Saturday.
Yes, I lost everything, including my nearly completed –surely legendary– Carnival of the NBA document.
No, I still can’t decide which I hate more: interpretive dance or the Old Navy.
Anyway, here’s this month’s Carnival of the NBA. I’m sorry if it’s uncreative and boring. I just didn’t have it in me to start another imaginary conversation between Hubie Brown, Bill Walton and Ahmad Rashad all over again. (And you think I’m kidding … sigh…)
Ok, annoying forced comments, followed by links, followed by blog credit, starting … now!
> I can’t decide which one I love more: “#68: He used to make a point of entering the Smith Center down by the memorabilia room in order to flirt with Smith Center receptionist Angela King” or “#96: He loves his mother.”
100 Reasons (And More) To Love Rasheed Wallace [Detroit Bad Boys]
> One telling stat to be concerned with: Darko leads the league in increased melanoma off the bench. I hope he’s SPF 200’n down there.
Darko Does Disney: A Magic Fan’s Perspective [DBB]
> Comment No. 10: “He by no means will be in consideration, nor will he likely get more than a vote or two, but don’t overlook the season that Pau Gasol has put together for a Grizzlies…” Well said.
MVP Talk [End of the Bench]
> Oh, here’s a taste of what would’ve been:
Ok, you’re Henry Abbott, you’re a respected journalist, and you’re also one of the best NBA bloggers out there. You want to make a good impression, show that you’re in the know, so you write a fantastic review about Rick Telander’s book.
Heaven is a Playground [TrueHoop]
> Raymond Felton is better than Chris Paul. (Ducking) Don’t shoot! I didn’t say it!
Raymond Felton > Chris Paul? [Bobcats Planet]
> Spurs playoff strategy guide: stay healthy, hoo-ha wax everything, and avoid premature shots that cause polyps. This post LOL’d the hell out of me.
Must Learn Focus! [Pounding The Rock]
> Quick Q: is Jason Richardson already the next ‘Nique? It’s all there, right? Great scorer, awesome dunker, the underachieving franchise…
Human Highlight Film Immortalized In Hall [Impending Firestorm]
> Check the italics: Terry Stotts is not the problem in Milwaukee.
Bucks vs. Suns Game VictoRecap [Bucks Town]
> Oh wow, I’m sorry ’05-06 Knicks. How rude of me. Umm… let me introduce you to the ‘90 Yankees, the ’93 Mets, the ’96-96 Islanders, the ’99-00 Rangers, and… sorry, I didn’t catch your name earlier? Right, yes, the ’96 Jets. Sorry.
Pick A Word, Any Word… [Father Knickerbocker]
> Sure, sure, maybe you can make ‘em wear sport jackets. And yeah, ok, you can get rid of those baggy jeans. But don’t you ever – EVER! – go messing with a man’s groin and his tights, you hear?
Jerry Stackhouse Needs His Tights [Give Me The Rock]
> For just $49.99, you too can blow Ben Wallace … up.
All The Fun, Half The Bruises: The Ben Wallace Blow-Up Doll [Detroit Bad Boys]
> From ‘03 to ’06, LeBron to Reece Gaines … it’s the “Best Draft Ever” revisited.
A Period Of 3 Years, Part One [Motoring]
> Playoff race, schmlayoff race! Let’s talk about attitude!
Culture Club [Blog-A-Bull]
> “The Bucks better beat Washington both times they play them the rest of the way … they would be screwed if we ended up having to face Miami or New Jersey in the first round … Larry Hughes coming back should definitely make the Cavs not as good as they are now … Remember what happened with Chris Webber and the Kings…” (And that’s just the title!)
These Mofo’s Better Beat Washington… [5-Point Bucks]
> From this day forward, April 1, 2006 shall forever be remembered as the day that Sasha Pavlovic threw one down! (Oh, and maybe that whole LeBron vs D-Wade battle-thingy too. Maybe.)
Opening Day Was Saturday [Straight Bangin’]
> Grant, have you seen your wife? Just retire already, dude…
Grant Hill Closer To Retirement? [Believing in Magic]
> Roby? Ager? Pittsnogle? Kurt gets the Lakers draft ball rolling…
Early Draft Thoughts [Forum Blue & Gold]
> Talk about blogger dedication! In the span of just 3 hours, Natalie flew to New York to catch Sheed live on ESPN’s Quite Frankly, turned Parker into a skunk and blew up Dwayne Wade’s head. Oh, all that, and she probably did this in her sleep.
[Need4Sheed.com]
Update: Sheed’s Quite Frankly video clip now up. Good timing.
> “If we were drafting lead guitarists, or rowers, I would run the draft.” Ten questions answered from Celtics CEO, Wyc Grousbeck.
Wyc Season End Interview [CelticsBlog.com]
> Haiku Golden State Warrior recaps:
“Andris Beidrins foul
Foul, Foul, Foul, Foul, Foul, Foul, Foul
Score a goddamn point.”
Just one of many amazing things happening over at Golden State of Mind.
> “Sebastian Telfair, why don’t white guys look good in corn rows, and do you think I could pull off the corn row look?” Best. Interview Question. Ever.
Mr. Uppercut Goes To Tualatin [Blazer’s Edge]
> Woah, what? Bill Simmons thinks I’m dirt? (Blushing) That’s cute.
Here I Dreamt I Was An Architect. Or, Bill Simmons for Dummies [SacTown Royalty]
> What do you get when you combine the Atlanta Hawks with the Golden State Warriors? A playoff team! (Cymbal crash) I kid, I kid. Check out this new site from MVN Hawks and Warriors writer’s Chase and Dave.
[Full Court Press]
> Vince Carter and Antonio Davis talk about leadership. Yes, that joke just wrote itself.
Ex-Raptors Audio Clips [HoopsAddict.com]
Bonus: Ryan’s basketball mural is finally complete. Check it out.
> Wanted: new arch nemesis for YAYsports! to make fun of. He’s taking submissions. (My pick? Antoine Walker.)
Carlos Boozer Is Good [YAYsports!]
> And now… drum roll please… the Top 5 most-linked NBA blog entries since the last Carnival. (Yao Ming thanks to Jason from the awesomely awesome lowpost.net for compiling this list.) In no particular order, well, except mine first:
- Two Knicks Just Chillin’ [The Basketball Jones]
- Chris Ballad Doesn’t Get It [True Hoop]
- Danny Fortson: Cyborg Smasher, Part 1 [Supersonicsoul]
- Charting 2005-06 Team Performance [lowpost.net]
- Off the Head like Decapitation [Free Darko]
> And finally, if you haven’t done so already, please don’t forget to listen, download and subscribe to the best NBA podcast in the world:
Yeah, you heard me… the best in the world! Next week Tas, J and I will be recording two, hour-long NBA Playoff Preview shows starring NBA bloggers from each playoff team. Make sure you have a listen.
Ok, that’s it. We’re finished, we’re done, game over man, game over. Bye.
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15 Responses to “Carnival of the NBA #26”
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The Basketball Jones is a NBA blog and podcast, written and recorded five times a week by J.E. Skeets, Tas Melas and Jason Doyle. Comments, questions and cold hard cash are always welcome and much appreciated. Contact us.
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Nice work, Skeets.
Nice work, Skeets.
Interesting that your computer died at the same time as The Cavalier’s, though. Are we sure that you’re not the same person?
No, I’m actually Jiri Welsch.
Jiri Welsch??? I always suspected you were vastly overrated…
Jiri… this is great stuff. You should take up blogging fulltime. Word up Skeets!
Homer!
Awesome job Skeets, worth the wait. Puts click and roll to SHAME!
Fantastic, Skeets.
If you are the Cavalier will you please do a comic about Tony Parker’s secret life as an agent for the French Resistance?
If you’re Jiri Welsch, can you tell me whether or not Ersan Ilyasova is really actor Jim Carrey??
great job Skeets!
who’s head did you paste onto the dance? Is it Michael Cage? Tyrone Hill?
Ryan: that’s Charles Oakley’s bitch.
Good post guys. You effectively killed 2 hours of precious study time. Well done.
T.
Charles Oakley??? That’s Tyrone Hill FO SHO!
Oops I thought you said “that’s Charles Oakley bitch”, didn’t notice the “’s” my bad, and I don’t remember Tyrone Hill ever being Oakley’s bitch?
Nice to see you back up and running buddy, I was worried about you for a while. Didn’t know how i was supposed to get my skeets fix…
[…] I’m a little late on this… but in case you don’t read any other basketblogs, you can check out the Carnival on JESkeets to get a taste of what you’re missing. « Less Links […]