NBA Prep Work: Heat

As part of The Basketball Jones extensive ‘06-07 season preview, I’ve been awarded the honor of going “one-on-one” with a representative from all 30 NBA teams. (No, not really.)

Today I sit down and chat with Miami Heat forward Antoine– WHAT!? No!

ONE-ON-ONE WITH … ANTOINE WALKER

J.E. Skeets: Oh, no. No, no, no, no…
Antoine Walker: What?

Skeets: No, no, no, no, no…
Walker: What? What’s wrong?

Skeets: [to producer] You said at the very least — the very least — we’d get Doleac.
Walker: Is there a problem?

Skeets: Hold on. [to producer] Is this a joke? Honestly. Who did this?
Walker: Can I help at all?

Skeets: Woah, does it look like I’m talking to you?
Walker: Sorry.

Skeets: [to producer] No. No. No. I specifically said I’d do Wade, Shaq, Haslem, Alonzo…
Walker: Very funny…

Skeets: Am I smiling? [to producer] J-Will, Payton, Shandon Anderson…
Walker: OK, I’m sitting right here…

Skeets: … Kapono, Simien, Doleac…
Walker: Done yet?

Skeets: … Pat Riley, athletic trainer Ron Culp, or Burnie.
Walker: I don’t believe this.

Skeets: Look, I’m sorry. It’s… um, it’s not you. Yeah, it’s me.
Walker: Really?

Skeets: No, it’s you.
Walker: Wow…

Skeets: Yeah, I just… I just really dislike you.
Walker: Um…

Skeets: But hey, try the Chex mix — solid amount of pretzels in there. In fact, take some home with you if you want. Um, OK… bye.
Walker: Um… bye.

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By J.E. Skeets at 10:01 pm on 09.23.2006 — Tags: '06/07 Season Preview, Heat

Comments

12 Responses to “NBA Prep Work: Heat”

  1. Sean at 11:24 pm on 09.23.2006

    To try to repay you for the laughs, check THIS out.

  2. Dennis at 11:58 pm on 09.23.2006

    Damn, Skeets… did ‘Toine not call you the next day like he said he would as he closed the motel room door or something?

  3. MattB at 12:25 am on 09.24.2006

    He lays bricks and your mom?

    I love employee #8.

  4. J.E. Skeets at 1:34 am on 09.24.2006

    Sean: Thank you.

    Dennis: You go ahead and draft him. I sure as hell ain’t.

    MattB: Intern #8 “shoots” to quick in the “sex clock” to ever “lay” my mom.

  5. J.E. Skeets at 1:35 am on 09.24.2006

    And oh… Antoine Walker fucking sucks.

  6. Dennis at 2:05 am on 09.24.2006

    Nah, no way I touch Mr. Shimmy in the draft. Actually, anywhere.

  7. Jack at 2:35 am on 09.24.2006

    Haha. Shimmyboy does indeed “fucking suck.” That’s the ONLY thing that gets laid around him are bricks clanking on the rim.

  8. Frank at 3:49 am on 09.24.2006

    Walker gets called on travelling violations at least once EVERY game.

    Fact!

  9. Frank at 3:50 am on 09.24.2006

    Walker always looks at the ref like he “stole his soul” when he gets called on said violations.

    Fact!

  10. MattB at 11:03 am on 09.24.2006

    Antoine Walker wins rings. It’s now a fact.

    Wade is overrated…it’s all Toine.

  11. The Basketball Jones » Yeah, And Araujo Is A Minus-27 at 12:19 pm on 09.24.2006

    […] And oh, just so you know, Antoine Walker checks in with a player rating of 79. (Insert “79 points too many” joke here.) […]

  12. The Big Picture at 7:37 pm on 09.24.2006

    not one mention of his 33% Field goal percentage? wow, you went easy on him.

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