Romance on the Hardwood: Carmelo and Allen

playing: “Kiss From a Rose” by Seal

Carmelo: Shhhh, there there.
Allen: I missed you so much.
Carmelo: I know, I know.
Allen: It’s been tough, Carmelo.
Carmelo: OK…
Allen: I felt so… so…
Carmelo: Just let it out.
Allen: So cold.
Carmelo: It’s OK. Your Bunsen burner’s here.

[Awkward silence]

Allen: It’s so good to have you back.
Carmelo: It’s great to be back.
Allen: Did you miss me?
Carmelo: Yes.
Allen: Really?
Carmelo: Of course! C’mon, what type of question is that?
Allen: I don’t know. I’m fragile.
Carmelo: Well, I am.
Allen: OK, cool.

[Awkward silence]

Allen: I thought I was going to die.
Carmelo: Huh?
Allen: I thought I was going to die without you.
Carmelo: Please…
Allen: I did! Things were so dark, Carmelo.
Carmelo: OK, now you’re just being dramatic.
Allen: I am not. Kleiza’s horrible!
Carmelo: Calm down.
Allen: No! He is. And Camby! My God. Camby’s creepy lanky!
Carmelo: OK, easy…
Allen: I thought I was going to die.
Carmelo: Sure.

[Awkward silence]

Allen: *quietly sobbing*
Carmelo: Holy shit. Now what?
Allen: It’s– It’s– It’s–
Carmelo: Why are you crying?
Allen: It’s great to have you back.
Carmelo: You already said that.
Allen: I mean it, Carmelo. It really is.
Carmelo: Yeah yeah, awesome.

[Awkward silence]

Carmelo: Hey, whatta say we stop dancing for a sec? Grab a drink or something?
Allen: What? During Seal? No! I love Seal!
Carmelo: Shit, right, I forget. Sorry.
Allen: You know how much I love Seal, Carmelo. The way he’s overcome such adversity in his life. You know how I relate to that!
Carmelo: Yup.
Allen: He battled discoid lupus as a child, Carmelo! Discoid lupus!
Carmelo: Right, good.
Allen: Do you know what discoid lupus is, Carmelo?
Carmelo: Why must you keep saying my name? And yes, of course I do. I just forgot that–
Allen: Discoid lupus is a chronic autoimmune disease that debilitates the immune system, attacking the body’s cells an–
Carmelo: And tissues, resulting in inflammation and sometimes permanent skin damage. Yes, I know. His face is fucked.
Allen: For you to even suggest we stop dance–
Carmelo: We’re dancing, we’re dancing! Fuck. Just drop it.

[Awkward silence]

Allen: It’s really great to have you back.
Carmelo: I want to punch you.

****************************************

Romance on the Hardwood: The Series

Kobe & Pargo: “If You Don’t Know Me By Now”
Kobe & Pargo (Pt. 2): “Wonderful Tonight”
Gilbert & Deron: “Unchained Melody”
LeBron & Vince: “All My Life”
Kobe & Nash: “Everything I Do (I Do It For You)”
Jason & Anthony: “Put Your Head On My Shoulder”
Kobe & Andrew: “Wicked Game”

(Bonus: Romance on the Gridiron — Ben & Kurt: “Truly, Madly, Deeply” at KSK)

This page is supported by: Have you ever thought about joining an online dating service? Whether you are looking for a relationship or simply just a friendship, our dating website will have you meeting people all over the world. From Ireland personals to Mexico singles, you will make international friendships!

Share This

Comments (6)
By J.E. Skeets at 8:55 pm on 01.24.2007 — Tags: Romance on the Hardwood, Allen Iverson, Carmelo Anthony, Photo Fun

Apparently, Melo Is Into Betsy

I ask you to recall those incredibly not-safe-for-work, cocaine-laced Pat O’Brien voicemail messages that were makin’ their way around the Interweb a while ago.

OK, ya good?

Um, yeah … I just wanted to inform you that the woman sitting on Melo’s lap there — flashin’ a little Cougar nip for the camera — is none other than O’Brien’s famous, jealous woman herself: “Betsy”.

Yeah, Betsy has a blog.

*Shakes head in disbelief*

Why am I telling you this? I have no idea.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t do this.

More From The Snake Pit Ball [B…SCENE!]
Pat O’Brien Sexual Harassment Scoreboard! [GorillaMask] — NSFW

Share This

Comments (6)
By J.E. Skeets at 4:38 pm on 07.24.2006 — Tags: Carmelo Anthony, Random, Nuggets

Close
E-mail It