Lazy Live-Blog: USA vs. Venezuela
A few notes from Wednesday night’s USA vs. Venezuela FIBA preliminary …
– Starting line-up for the USA: Kidd, Kobe, LeBron, Melo and Dwight. Not bad I guess.
– Score: 3-0 USA, one minute into the game: Kobe dives full-on at half for a loose ball. Just give him the gold now.
– What in hell could the Venezuelan guys possibly be saying to each other in the huddle? “Try harder?”
– Young Thunder should try to slap stickers on every shot he blocks. At least during this tournament.
– Good: Amare’s lazy-hawk and taped-up earring look. Bad: Michael Redd’s ever-expanding bald spot.
– 06’s Operation Get Gunners seems to be working: Redd and Miller already have a three each.
– Odd: Amare has Dwight’s #12. I wonder if there’s a story behind that?
– At the end of 1: USA 21, VEN 8. Ugh. Walton: “Eight points is not going to get it done. It’s as if they are waiting to fall so far behind so the USA will get over-confident.” Yes, that’s exactly Venezuela’s game plan, Bill.
– Kobe with one of the prettiest reverse lay-ups in the history of Western civilization. My words, not Bill’s.
– OK, this is getting ridiculous: Dwight and LeBron just dunked an alley-oop pass at the same time! I hope the scorekeeper gives ‘em four points for that. It’s not like anyone would notice.
– I can’t keep up with these highlight reel plays. Hell, I don’t even know how to describe them.
– Here, I’ll try with this one: No-look pass, behind-the-back-pass, dunk. In that order.
– Mark Jones just told me that the next dimension to Amare’s game is going to be a consistent three-point shot. I highly doubt that.
– Random question: If you could only pick one, which player would you rather build your franchise around — Luol Deng, Tayshaun Prince or Barbosa? I’m torn, but leaning towards Prince.
– I think Chandler’s the last one left to see the floor. Doesn’t Coach K know this his third consecutive breakout year?
– At the half: USA 54, VEN 34. This is over. I’m done.
Live-Blogging Three Games … Sort Of
8:02pm: OK, the boys are here. Here we go. Again, I have no idea how this is actually going to work. The Hawks-Cavs game is currently being recorded, the Sonics-Heat is on the tube — in HD, yes! — and the Rockets-Griz starts… um… now I think? Shit. Oh, Kidney with a put-back — Sonics 11, Heat 11. BASKETBALL!
8:05pm: No Tracy, you’re a fool!
8:09pm: Watching games with fantasy die-hards is hilarious. It’s been 10-minutes and I’ve already heard, “No, no, shoot that,” “Alright, an assist for Ridnour,” “Yes, I need that three.”
8:12pm: End of the 1st Q.: Seattle 21, Miami 11. I’m real excited about live-blogging this game.
8:14pm: And we’re over to the start of the Rockets-Griz game. What!? Not in HD? What is this bush-league, amateur-hour bull-shit?
8:15pm: That was a lot of dashes. Back to the Sonics-Heat…
8:20pm: My D-Wade boner has faded over the last couple of months, but there’s two things I still love about his game: the deep kiss off the glass, and the way he can split two defenders.
8:23pm: I thought they were getting rid of that dead-ball rule at the end of the shot clock? Am I wrong? Why did I think this? KD? Evil KD?
8:25pm: Nice pass into Fortson. Two… and the foul. Timeout. Sonics 30, Heat 21.
8:27pm: Mike Miller looks like a girl I dated in the early 90’s. Rockets 17, Griz 8. Timeout. Pass me a cheetoh.
8:32pm: Grish: “Has Mutombo scored in the last few years?”
8:35pm: Back to the HD Sonics-Heat. Man, I love these stats at the bottom of the screen: Wade has scored double-digit points 78 of the last 79 games.”
8:37pm: Kidney with 2. The Heat have scored 8 straight … and Antoine with a put-back. Wow. Heat only down 2.
8:40pm: Looks like Yao thinks the Rockets are going to make the playoffs… he’s already growing the neck beard!
8:42pm: Damnit! We just saw the score for the Hawks-Cavs. Over we go… WHOA! What is wrong with the lighting in the Q? It’s so bright. Cavs 61, Hawks 59.
8:44pm: Text: “It’s an emotional game — Big Z” … Image: Big Z, completely zoned-out on the bench. Hahaha … Yeah, real emotional, Z…
8:46pm: FYI: Sonics up 6 at the half. Double FYI: Britney Spears broke up with K-Fed today.
8:49pm: Wisdom LeBron takes the charge. So wise…
8:52pm: And we’re back to the FedEx Forum. Oh, 27-21 Griz, 6-mins left in the 2nd. LIGHTS OUT! … Rudy with a jumper … Battier answers with a three; the crowd golf claps. That is polite.
8:57pm: Have the Griz played a Gay-Warrick-Swift line-up yet? I want to see that.
8:59pm: Biz LeBron with a beautiful pass to Marshall under the rim. Cavs up a couple.
9:02pm: LBJ iso on the left … blows by JJ baseline … scoops it up and in left-handed … Kid LeBron says, “Ooooooooooooo…”
9:07pm: Fact: Udonis Haslem was fat in college.
9:09pm: Alonzo just blocked an alley-oop. You think he blocs every shot his kids take on those little Fisher-Price nets? I do.
9:16pm: This is why I watch the game: 10,000 career points for Donyell. History, people. History.
9:17pm: JeffPotts, wins … CHUBBY HASLEM.
9:22pm: OK, back to the closest game: Cavs 84, Hawks 80. Under three to go…
9:25pm: LeBron chop-blocks Josh Smith, but no foul is called. Timeout Hawks. … Only 2 on the shot-clock … JJ WITH A MONSTER 3! Tie-game.
9:28pm: Hughes completely WASTES a possession … Gooden has to force a 3 … no good … Lue creates on the other end … Hawks score … LBJ comes back and settles for a deep 3 … miss … Lue fouled … misses the first … misses the second. OH MY GOD! GO TO BED, TYRONN! Timeout Cavs.
9:30pm: Simple, simple play drawn up by Coach Brown. LBJ dribbles to the top of the court … swings it to Hughes on the right … he rattles home a 3. Cavs up 1. 35 secs left.
9:32pm: Solid perimeter D by the Cavs … the JJ/Zaza pick-and-roll isn’t there … ball’s swung around … J-Smooth has to force a jumper … miss.
9:34pm: Gooden hits both free-throws … 14 secs left for the Hawks … they need a three; where is Salim? … Tyronn has a Coke and takes in for an easy 2. Hawks down 1. 6 secs left. Timeout. Let’s talk about it.
9:37pm: LBJ fouled. At the line … he hits the first … misses the 2nd! … Hawks bring it up … Tyronn into the paint-by-numbers … TEARDROP! Tyronn ties ‘er up. OVERTIME, BABY!
9:42pm: Who are you Tyronn Lue? And why are you missing an “e” on the end of your name? Hawks up 3 … 3 1/2 left.
9:46pm: Joe Johnson gets 3 the hard way. (I heard that on TV once.) Hawks up 6. CAW-CAW!
9:47pm: Joe hits another 3! He’s gotta a li’l Melo-clutch in him, eh?
9:49pm: Quick look at the other games: Seattle 81, Miami 79 (5-minutes to go) … Rockets 64, Griz 60 (start of the 4th)
9:54pm: OK, we’re going to stick a fork in a McCain’s deep-and-delicious cake and then the Hawks-Cavs game. It’s over. Hawks win. JJ and Tyronn … well played, men man and boy.
9:57pm: Wade nails a 3. (His third of the game.) We’ve got ourselves another game here, folks … Sonics up 3, about 2 1/2 left.
10:00pm: What’s with all the superstars choking at the line tonight? First LeBron, then Wade, now Ray-Ray misses one. Seattle up 3 with only a minute left. Miami ball.
10:01pm: Ken, on the superstars missing free-throws: “It’s a role player’s game.” Hahahahaha…
10:02pm: Wade is fouled. (Surprise, surprise.) He hits both at the line.
10:05pm: Ray takes it to the net … draws the foul … hits the first … and misses the second … Wade brings it up, down 2 … pulls up for the jumper, but passes to Posey who knocks down the 3 … Timeout … Miami up 1. 19 secs. left.
10:06pm: Quick Rockets-Griz look-in: Dahtnay Jones — is that the right spelling? — with a monster dunk in some traffic. Nice timing with the remote there.
10:09pm: Damien Wilkins falls in the corner … jump-ball … and oh Lord, they foul Wade who tries to tip the ball down court … Wade hits both. Heat up 3 … no timeouts for Seattle … Watson pushes it up … Damien gets a wide-open look at the 3 … MISSES! Gerald would of hit that!
10:11pm: And Dominique would have dunked it … from behind the 3-pt line.
10:12pm: I hope Damien’s not invited to this year’s Wilkin thanksgiving dinner.
10:14pm: Is anyone still here? KD? Jeff? Mutoni? Nora’s dad?
10:15pm: Ken: “What’s your favorite player/luncheon meat combo?” Yup, we’ve reached that point…
10:17pm: Grish: “I’ll take a Garbajosa with cheddar”. Amazing…
10:19pm: Well, well, well… what happened here? Rockets up six, 50 secs. left. Cardinal misses a three, Chucky misses a three, Michael Dickerson misses a three…
10:20pm: …you’re still paying attention, yes?
10:22pm: Oh, Nora sees your “Darvin Ham on rye”, Jeff. And she raises you with a “Calderon Calzone”. I have no idea why this is so much fun…
10:24pm: And it’s over: Houston 86, Memphis 80. (No, they didn’t stop playing after 3 quarters.)
10:32pm: Well, I guess that’s it. Thanks for reading along, thanks for the comments, and goodni– NO! LAKERS … T-WOLVES … GAME 4 … NEXT!
10:38pm: I’m kidding, I’m kidding… thanks a lot, guys. That was a lot of fun. See you — and by see you, I mean you’ll hear me — early tomorrow morning. Don’t forget to get your questions in. I’m out.
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