Sam Cassell Could Phone Home With This …

I won’t even try to out-funny Ballhype commenter “RedBaron” with this one: Here’s a new NBA-inspired cell phone that looks just like a 1992 Sony Walkman.

The N111 is specifically geared towards the NBA fan. Specifications for this handset have not been revealed by its producers. But as seen, we can surmise that it has a camera, a large screen which will probably bring high quality image display. Moreover, the navigation main button has the design of a basketball.

Besides looking like a piece of crap, the timing of this phone is a little strange considering it’s the middle of August. I wonder if the NBA is actually even endorsing this? Is China known to produce unauthentic knock-offs? Hmmmm…

NBA Mobile N111 Phone [Mobile Whack via Ballhype]

Share This

Comments (0)
By J.E. Skeets at 11:27 am on 08.08.2007 — Tags: Ugly Cell Phones, Marketing

Kobe Bryant Might Win A Giant Stuffed Animal

Word on the street today is that influential advertising agency Wieden+Kennedy is helping to produce a new fully animated TV campaign for ESPN and ABC’s NBA coverage:

Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, Dirk Nowitzki and Gilbert Arenas are among the players who will star, albeit in animated form, in a new campaign from ESPN touting its coverage of the NBA. Four spots will break this week, each showing players or teams attempting to surpass something they already have achieved on the court.

In “The Feats,” we see Bryant at a High Striker, the hammer-and-bell device found at carnivals with which participants test their strength. Instead of a hammer, however, he slams a Spalding basketball on the platform to send a projectile up the tower. In reference to the 81 points he scored in a game last January, the tower is marked by increasingly difficult levels that read 70, 80, 90 and, at the top, 100, the number of points Wilt Chamberlain scored in 1962 to set an NBA single-game record. Bryant changed his Los Angeles Lakers uniform number this season from 8 to 24, which a voiceover acknowledges with: “Will Kobe show us that 24 is greater than 100?”

“The Contenders” focuses on teams in prime position to vie for the NBA title. Shaquille O’Neal, Dwyane Wade and head coach Pat Riley of the NBA defending champion Miami Heat are shown with their championship rings while Dallas Mavericks’ all-star Nowitzki and head coach Avery Johnson are tying a heart together with ropes. The voiceover, referencing the Mavs loss to Miami in last season’s finals, offers, “Will the Mavericks mend a broken heart?”

Um, okaaaaay then …

The Game: ESPN, NBA Are Drawn Together … [MEDIAWEEK]

(Update: I think I just found one of the new spots online! Yeah, it stars Tayshaun Prince …)

Share This

Comments (3)
By J.E. Skeets at 2:59 pm on 11.20.2006 — Tags: Marketing, Media

NBA Team Marketing Slogans

I love NBA team marketing slogans.

Every time I see one I can’t help but think of six or seven guys, huddled around some whiteboard, shouting out random words, while one of them takes notes and encourages the madness by saying things like, “Oh, ‘energizes’, good word, Rod”, as he circles and underlines the word like crazy.

That visual fucking kills me.

Anyway, I guess I was inspired by The Association’s post on the Wizards’ new slogan — Go All In! — because I decided to take a quick look around the rest of the league to see what those “six or seven guys” were yelling this year.

Here’s some I found — with a few notes/alternative suggestions thrown in for shits and Gugliottas:

1. New Jersey Nets: Bring It

Let’s see… “Touch It” doesn’t work because you’d injure Vince; “Pay It” sounds greedy; “Watch It”, too minimal; “Turn It”, makes no sense; “Leave It” is more up the Knicks alley; and “Stop, Format It” is just way too digital. Yup, “Bring It” it is. Good choice. (Note: A team owned by Jay-Z goes with a Busta slogan? BEEF!)

Proposed marketing slogan: Puff, Puff, Pass It. (Visual: The Nets team is huddled in a circle, smoking a j, while Uncle Cliffy talks about “integrity”, Radiohead, and the importance of conquering Australia in Risk. Oh, and Lawrence Frank is passed out on Mikki Moore’s lap.)

2. Atlanta Hawks: The Highlight Factory

Not bad. Watching the Hawks play usually does feel like work.

3. Detroit Pistons: DEEE-TROIT BASKETBALL!

First off, why is “Detroit” spelled wrong? Fucking interns. Second, if it’s like that on purpose, why only the three E’s? Is that all Mason deserves nowadays? Man, you’d think he’d be worth, four, maybe five E’s at least, no? Troit’s actually a funny word when you say it. Troit. Sounds like a bad case of the runs. You know, in Royal Oak or something…

4. New York Knicks: Experience The Unbelievable

Perfect! Brilliant! Don’t even touch it! Next?

5. Utah Jazz: Pure Adrenaline Rush

Gordan Giricek with the pull-up jumper… PURE ADRENALINE RUSH! Deron Williams delivers a solid, two-handed chest pass… PURE ADRENALINE RUSH! Jerry Sloan 20-second timeout… PURE ADRENALINE RUSH!

Proposed marketing slogan: Totally Narly, Dude.

6. Phoenix Suns: Eyes On The Prize

Proposed marketing slogan: Eyes On Amare’s Knee, Nash’s Back, Raja’s Website, And Boris’ Calorie Intake.

7. Minnesota Timberwolves: True Blue

Skeets: [into tape recorder, softly] The Timberwolves suffer from a rare disorder combining symptoms of amnesia, dyslexia, and color-blindness, with a highly acute sense of hearing.
Timberwolves: [from adjoining room] I’m not color blind, am I?
Skeets: I’m afraid you are.

8. Philadelphia 76ers: It’s A Philly Thing!

Um, Sixers’ fans seems to like it: “The 76ers marketing slogan this year is “It’s a Philly thing,” which is true, because Philly sports teams aren’t usually that good.”

Proposed marketing slogan: It’s Also A Cleveland And Atlanta Thing!

9. Sacramento Kings: Passion 4 Purple

Proposed marketing slogan: Got Purp? (C’mon, admit it: a Big Boi/Ron Artest “Kryptonite” remix would be ridiculous … ly awesome. In fact, this needs to happen now. AAAHHH, (I’m on it) …

10. Orlando Magic: CommITment Energizes

To flush out my example from above:

OK, what else, guys? Let’s hear ‘em…
Power! Strength!

Yes, yes. And?
Uplift!

Lovin’ it, lovin’ it…
Boost!

Ah, like jet fuel. We’re so close. Somebody take it to the next level…
Energizes!

Oh, “energizes”, great word, Rod! Now play with it, mold it…
Bunny!

Um…
Jackrabbit!

OK, now we’re talking…
Bounce! Jump!

Keep ‘em coming…
Penis!

Huh?
Commitment!

WHOA! Who said that?
Derek.

Fantastic stuff, Derek. You’ve been getting a lot of sleep lately, haven’t ya?
I have. Thank you.

“Commitment energizes”. I think we’ve got it.
Hey, just noticed this. There’s an “it” in the middle of commitment.

Expand…
Like, you know, the Magic are sort “it” this year.

That’s some very deep shit, Walt.
I know, pretty stupid. I’m sorry.

Sorry? Are you kidding me? It’s brilliant! Bold and capitalize that “it” … “CommITment energizes.” Wow.
It does look pretty cool…

Pretty cool? PRETTY COOL!? It looks pretty fucking awesome!
Oh, yes. Definitely.

OK, done. Great work, guys! Burrito Brothers on me?
YAY!

Share This

Comments (14)
By J.E. Skeets at 4:55 pm on 11.09.2006 — Tags: Marketing

Close
E-mail It